The more I thought, the nearer I was to tears.

Good Afternoon;

  I was doing just a bit of surfing before heading out to get some work done.  It's a beautiful day here today:  The sounds of birds singing is coming through my open door as I type this, along with the very homey sound of a neighbor mowing his lawn, children playing in the street, and even the sounds of traffic going down the near by highway - an sort of unwelcome sound, but a constant low hum even miles away.  Then I see this picture and I can't not voice the ache in my soul:

  Just for a minute, consider this:  Here is a little girl, just four years old.  In her short life, she has known violence to the point that when someone points something at her she assumes it is a gun and she is doing everything she can to show she is not doing anything threatening and therefore worthy to be shot.

  I don't know what sort of real validity this picture holds.  Maybe this is a fake.  Got me.  But, what I see is the Very Real Likelihood that it is quite real, quite factual.  And somewhere is a little girl who knows way more about war and guns and violence in the name of some god or government or control freak than could ever be considered decent.  And, here I sit, on the other side of the world from her in my suburban home with the nice lawn and the trees that squirrels love to run about and twitch their jaunty little fuzzy tails at my goofy dog who would SO LOVE to get much much closer to said cheeky squirrel, with the knowledge that my governmental leaders appear quite eager to continue that sort of education for this little one.

  So, now I have to go out, with work to do on my house that suddenly seems very trite, and try not to cry as her little sad face haunts me.

Been away

Hello All;
  I need to keep this short.  This week, I've had my parents staying with me while they attend family functions in the area.  There are good sides to this:  I do like my parents, so their company is nice to have.  Mom is a great cook.  They even did some chores for me - I think they were bored.  The down side is that it disrupts my already crazy schedule and gets me out of my routine.  Since I work nights, the graveyard shift, routine is important in order to have any hope of getting sleep.  I've not gotten much this week.
  The fun part of all of this:  I've had an extra long week at work.  I've worked over 60 hours at the night job and had three lawns this week that I just couldn't put off.
  So, yesterday, Saturday, after I finished some outdoor chores cleaning out the gutters and other yard work, I began a day long nap.  I slept in my chair off and on -- usually I would wake up enough to say "no, there's nothing wrong, I'm just tired" to the incessant "are you ok?"'s coming from Mom and Dad!!!    Finally, I went to bed.   Gracie curled up next to me.  Slept like a rock for 9 hours.  Two or three more of those, I think I'll be ready to face this new week....

I have this dream.  I want to retire in five years.  Sell the house, move to a northern part of Michigan with enough land that I can cut my own wood for winter heat, and for the most part live a more relaxed - less chasing the bills - type of life.  I've been in love with the concept of the tiny house movement for years.  I think my butt is far too big for that, but I do think that a smaller place that is efficient to heat and maintain while also inexpensive to build is the way to go.  When I look at my life, I don't really need a lot.  America seems to have lost the concepts of living minimally, and we want the big cars or trucks, the big homes, the big meals....   ok, I like the big trucks thing, and I really like the big meals thing.  But, is that really the best way for us to live?
  I want to have a garden that I have time to work and eat good food that isn't prepackaged in Chile.  I don't want to have to get up every day and go to work at a job I don't like, and that really seems to put more money in someone else's pocket than do much for my own.  I think I spend far too much of my salary paying taxes and paying for gas, food, and clothing I'll need to get to, eat at, and wear to work!!  I want time to look out at the morning sun and contemplate the universe, just for a few moments, with my hot coffee in hand and a dog terrorizing the local squirrels, hopefully not the skunks, and not be so old that I'm risking filling my Depends at the sight of it all.
   So, what sort of goals do you have?  Maybe you will inspire me??
hugs